lady-of-greenwood:

patternofdefiance:

just-a-kind-of-magic:

Imagine being a human in an alien crew in space and leaving with bright blue or pink hair and the color fades and everybody on board wonders WHY you are losing your colors??? Is it the lack of greens? Are you sad? Angry? They just don’t know??

“Human-Kelly may we have a moment of your time?”

Kelly pauses in her inventorying of the photo-synth plates she’ll be installing after today’s cycle ends. “It’s just Kelly, hellot-Halzar, you don’t have to acknowledge my species every time we talk.” She smiles. “That’s not considered rude for us.”

“Very well hu—Kelly. Erm. May we have a moment of your time?” Many eyes blink earnestly at her.

“Sure. What’s up?”

hellot-Halzar considers. “May we discuss the structural nature of the ship interior and gravity-derived reference values at a later date? At this moment we would like to inquire as to the nature of your corporeal change.”

“Yeah sure—wait my what?”

“There is a mess hall wager.”

“About my –?”

“Concerning your strands,” hellot-Halzar says, gesturing.

“My….hair.” Kelly runs a hand through it. It’s purple as of two ship days ago. “Ok?”

“We wish to know whether the colour change signifies mood, nutritional intake variance, or ….erm….whether your mating season status has changed.”

“My mating season status, huh?” Kelly lifts an eyebrow.

“Yes.”

“Did Jerry put you up to this?”

“Human-Jerry refused to answer our questions about your strands, citing some phenomenon known to your homeworld as ‘famine in missed eek’.”

Kelly snorted. “Tell Jerry he can shove his archaic ideas about ‘feminine mystique’ where M-series stars don’t shine. As for your bet: sorry, it’s none of the above. I changed my hair because my last box of dye was about to expire and because I felt like it.”

hellot-Halzar considers. “chinret-Zer wins then, by technicality: that reason falls within acceptable parameters for ‘mood’.”

“I suppose it does.” Kelly pauses. “Who bet on the ‘mating season’ one?”

“Hmm?” hellot-Halzar had already turned to go and deliver the verdict. They turn one set of eyes back. “Oh that would be Drannuc. He said he smelled a difference in you.”

“Delightful,” Kelly says, instead of explaining menstruation and how that can affect mood, diet, and that technically it correlates to what most of the species on the ship would consider a mating season.
“Next time, instead of betting, maybe just ask questions? And not Jerry. He’s a jerk.”

“Reclassifying human-Jerry as jerk-Jerry. We will approach you with all human queries from now on,” hellot-Halzar says and then continues on their way.

Probably for the best, she thinks with a lopsided grin, and then continues sorting the photo-synth plates to install on her space walk tomorrow.

“Reclassifying human-Jerry as jerk-Jerry” 

Pure. There is no other word.

hvlth-gxth:

showerthoughtsofficial:

Do “flat earthers” think all the planets are flat or just the Earth?

Fuckin goofball thinks there’s other planets.

cerastes:

writing-prompt-s:

You sell your soul to God. Instead of having bliss in life and then damnation, you life a life of utter misery and then go to Heaven when you die.

That’s just regular Catholicism.

frenchzodiacgirl:

Aries: they are secretly romantic, great listeners and they are not as confident as they may seem

Taurus: they set high standards for themselves, they are more rational than emotional and they are organized 

Gemini: they are pretty sensitive, unable to say “no” to their friends and they love staying indoors sometimes

Cancer: they are very resilient, extremely complex and they have some of the most diverse sense of humor

Leo: they place others’ needs before their own, they are incredibly clingy and they are really smart people

Virgo: they are up for any adventures, they have intense trust issues and they never forgive

Libra: they are heavily educated/ informed, they notice the smallest details and they aren’t always optimistic

Scorpio: they are super shy and bashful when they first meet people, they are hilarious and all they want is true love and to start their own family

Sagittarius: they are undeniably poetic, they are committed when they find the right person and they are caring

Capricorn: they know how to let loose and party hard, they have contagious laughs and they are compassionate

Aquarius: they are in-tune with their feelings deep down inside, they are charismatic and they forget easily

Pisces: they fear loneliness, they are tough/strong and they have huge ambitions