zuge:

i cant wait to be a piece of shit w/ a bachelors degree

antiandrogen:

i’m glad my mom caused most of my childhood trauma instead of my dad so my therapy sessions can pass the bechdel test

shitload-of-muses:

paper-mario-wiki:

if u ever find a genie and you’re really craving a dessert that looks like this:

do NOT say “i’d like a lifetime supply of raspberry crowns”

while this is, in fact, the name of the pastry, it’s ALSO the name of a species of wasp for some reason. the genie, being a nasty trickster, will no doubt give you a bunch of wasps.

this is an oddly specific post are you ok

vergilsuggestions:

go to the mcdonald’s drive-thru and order one black coffee for yourself and nothing for the medieval christian poet that you’re guiding through hell

forgotaboutdrea:

rnyfh:

in this house we stan dionysus!

#Hermes: he’s dead Dionysus you don’t actually have to do this #Dionysus [polishing his giant wooden dildo]: I made a PROMISE (x)

marisatomay:

i saw goody proctor die in infinty war

captainsnoop:

people act like unfollowing and blocking are these big statements that only hard ass bastards do

i promise you they arent. Ive blocked and unfollowed people for saying they thought toaster strudels were bad. you shape your own online experience. you domt need that negativity. nobody online is worth shit

sealedbeastnue:

“what time is it” you ask, i pull out my 2.7 metric ton granite sundial and immediately crush both of your feet, I loudly announce “it is cloudy”